Originally posted in September on another site that doesn’t keep dates of when things were posted. Playing catch up.
Domlyskirts read what I wrote yesterday or so, when I was growly and not wanting to submit. I was almost about to break out the claws, but Domlyskirts had to go to sleep. I was still writing it when they woke up.
As I was still writing it. I paused. They blipped me on discord. “Keep going.”
I was pretty much done then.
Over the sleep… and the rest of today… my brain worked at what Domlyskirts said. “Keep going.”
Even though I was having a crisis of conscious. Even though I was writing negative stuff (not truly aimed at them, but yes, still negative), and they were reading it as I was writing… “Keep going.”
And my mind played connect-the-dotties.
Domlypants hated it when I wrote anything that was remotely negative about him, but he was stopped by one rule I had about my journalling – if he attacked me for writing negative, I was not going to write anymore. So he kinda suffered through my tantrums and trueism, and self-realizations with growls. He never commented on the posts, except to me over skype. He never told me to keep on writing. Never really encouraged it. He knew that if he did in public, I’d stop writing and he’d stop having a clue as to where I was in my mind and journey.
Domlyskirts says: “Keep going.”
Those two words… they mean the world to someone like me. Someone still exploring their sensuality and sexuality. You’d think at my age I knew what mine was. Nope. It’s all there in the document I wrote that Domlyskirts said for me to “keep going” on.
I look at it now, and I can see the duality there. There’s what society has forced down my throat, fighting against my own moral values which are pretty much 180 to what I was spoon fed as a child.
Maybe I’ll share what I wrote someday. I think Domlyskirts’ got a free ride into my mind. They’ve got the link to that cloud document. I think more will be coming out. Maybe it’ll end up on my tumblr, fetlife, or here.
I do know that Domlyskirts says we’re going to work on that too.
Two words: “Keep going” means the world to me. It means “I’ll read without passing judgement while you write, and we will discuss anything either of us believes needs to be discussed.”
“Keep going” – the words from a dominant who needs to see into the mind of their submissive.
“Keep going” – the words from a dominant who wants to help improve both their sub, and themselves.
“Keep going” – the words never said from a dom who wanted a fetish vendor.
“Keep going” – the words from someone who deserves my adoration, my time, my service, and my submission.
You better believe I will!